I don’t mean that I was born for this. Some people have this sense of destiny or fate, or they just really know what they want to do when they “grow up.” They just seem to know what they want to do (insert shrug here). Not so with me: it took me a while to figure “me” out – to make me.

As I look back on that process of making me who I am now, the most impactful, life-changing moments were the most subtle.

EDUCATION

I grew up with little means but with well-resourced schools and teachers who recognized a kid with an insatiable appetite for learning. After school, my dad would take my sister and I to the library where we devoured as many books as we could get our hands on. I didn’t discriminate; I read Reader’s Digest, To Kill a Mockingbird, books on entomology, and the backs of cereal boxes. The more I learned, the more I wanted to learn, the more possibilities there were. I remember filling out college applications thinking, “How am I supposed to choose just one thing to study?” Engineering seemed like the best way of taking what I enjoyed (math, physics, and art history) while allowing myself to be useful.

I chose to study structural engineering.

TRAINING

At KPFF, I have been blessed with generous teachers and mentors. I learned not only the technical aspects of structural engineering, but also how to plan, how to deal with stressful situations, how to use conflict to reach resolution, how to dialog. This work often feels hard because it is hard. But I have been trained to do hard things, and I can face them with both courage and creativity – this is what I hope to pass on to others I am training.

I choose to do hard things.

LOVE

It’s not what I was looking for when we met, but I cannot stress enough how important my partner has been to my career. I found a real partner in life, someone who celebrates my choices and supports my effort and ambition. Though I feel blessed, I don’t feel lucky. I don’t think of love as being discovered, fated, or completely up to chance. I think of love as a choice and a habit.

I choose to love him, and I choose to love my work.

MOTHERHOOD

I appreciate my parents much more now that I have children of my own – my parents had almost sainted levels of patience to have kept their cool as much as they did! Even so, I know my path to and through motherhood is more comfortable than my mother’s was and her mother’s was before her. My mother didn’t have a choice but to work, and she didn’t have many options on what her work would be (she stopped going to school at age eight). By contrast, I know the time I take away from my children and partner has to be meaningful enough to warrant the opportunity cost. My work as an engineer adds to society and saves lives.

I choose to be a working mother.

I am proud of the work I do and the person I am. My life made me for this. My work made me for this. I made me for this.

The post “I Was Made For This” – Celebrating International Women in Engineering Day 2022 appeared first on KPFF Greater Los Angeles Structural.

As a community, we dive deeper into issues that interest the members of our group and give us the opportunity to learn from each other. We usually gather at lunchtime to conduct round table discussions led by passionate facilitators, who share their insights on issues such as: career trajectory, being a working parent, dealing with difficult situations, or difficult conversations. We dive deeply into trainings such as Crucial Conversations, which can be applicable in all aspects of life. Just ask Mary! I especially enjoyed when Sharon Gallant, a Principal and Reporting Center Manager at KPFF, shared her experience and led an open conversation about the challenges and joys of rising to that position. Recognizing that non-engineers within our company would also benefit from the topical discussions and sense of community, we extended an invitation for our core business employees to join us as we meet, and I have appreciated their contributions to the network.

Our KPFF LA office knows how to take a break from work, and this group is no exception. Each summer, the Women’s Network hosts a social gathering to welcome our newest members and meet our counterparts in KPFF civil. This year’s virtual platform allowed us to get to know each other in a new way, with scavenger hunts and kids joining in on the fun.

We love to include our clients in the fun and have had a great time arranging happy hours with other women’s network’s at client companies, such as ZGF and PCL. Our three networks attend an annual event with an alternating host company to keep things interesting. The hosting firm will feature their female leaders and share their success within the company. The year we threw the party I learned a great deal about our panelist’s contributions to the success of KPFF, and I felt proud to be a part of a great company.

Moving forward, I am excited that we have diversified our network by including women from other teams in the office. Our support staff and modeler teams will be contributing to conversations about a multitude of themes like our upcoming meeting on the book Same Words, Different Language by Barbara Annis. Meetings like this will help the office as a whole dive deeper into ways we can use the strengths of both women and men to improve our practice and serve our community. After all, isn’t that what it’s all about?

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Our first event was at KPFF’s office October of 2018. We invited an inclusive guest list from all of our organizations to join us for a Women’s Network Triple Crown happy hour. The evening of drinks, appetizers and social activities was designed to help us get to know one another, dig deeper into established relationships, and learn more about our respective disciplines. The ladies and gentlemen that participated discussed how we navigate our professional and gender roles in our respective AEC fields. The goal of the evening was to demystify each other’s professions and we had a lot of fun doing just that.

Our second event was at ZGF’s office in March of 2019. We had a panel discussion about the power of effective negotiation. Our panel was comprised of, Mitra Memari, AIA, Partner from ZGF, Paula Stamp, PhD, Director of Business Development from PCL and myself, representing KPFF Structural. The panel was moderated by Brenda Radmacher from Gordon & Rees. Brenda kicked off the panel discussion with her perspective on negotiation in general, and insights on how to recognize when you are in a negotiation and to switch gears from a conversation to a negotiation.

The panel and I gave feedback on our approach and preparation for negotiation, and what makes for effective negotiations. Due to our shared understanding of the AEC industry, we were able to expand beyond personal negotiations, and spent time sharing stories about change orders, review processes and overall project goals. It was very enlightening to hear the personal experiences of the panel members. During the question and answer session with the audience, some sharp and thoughtful questions were asked, and a broader group of contributors shared their perspectives. It was a great evening, and I am happy that the event was well received by attendees. We are excited that this series of events has momentum, and we look forward to hosting and attending future events.

PCL is planning to host the next event which is currently under development. Our goal is for the women’s networks of ZGF, KPFF and PCL to host and program more events throughout the coming years. I am looking forward to learning from the amazing women in these firms and exploring topics that benefit the collaboration process between architects, engineers and contractors.

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